Five Years and a Fresh Start

It has been five years since I last posted on this blog. A lot changes in five years. Right before writing this post, I was reading my older posts; the three of them which have been here, waiting, waiting for someone to read, someone to comment on; waiting for me to continue; to continue writing down my thoughts. A lot indeed changes in five years. 

My therapist says I overthink a lot. Perhaps right she is. Let me correct myself. I during my therapy admitted that I overthink a lot. I discovered that I overthink a lot. So, let's start with the basics. What has changed afterall that made me think something, or rather a lot many things have changed. Well, I have gotten a new laptop. I am in a new city. I am in college. I am in a new environment. But have I changed?  Does someone really change? Or just rediscover themselves? Or just discover because you were never lost in the first place? Can change only be measured in material terms? 

Ughmm.. Let me pull back my focus to the question again. What has changed in five years? Oh yes! I have stopped writing. We did a quiz yesterday. We, as in I with a friend of mine. Since it was an online quiz, my friend came to my room so that we both could attempt the prelims. He told me or rather confessed to me. He confessed to me that he has stopped doing something that was once so dear to him. Why? He replied with a perhaps. Perhaps he was himself unsure. Nevertheless, he said perhaps he got so engrossed with everything that was happening around him; moots, publications, quizzes, classes, term papers and what not, that he lost track of what he actually loves to do. In that moment, I saw my reflection in his thoughts. What was it? He had stopped writing. Writing not for somebody else to read. Writing not for someone to comment on. Writing not boost one's own academic credentials. But writing for the sake of writing. Writing for his own sake. 

So here is a fresh start! A fresh start to my blog. No promise. No commitmments. I don't know if I will keep the blog alive. But yeah. Who is it for? I overthink. I overthink a lot. But at least for now, my overthinking has a space. The space that I call the Estoric.